I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
