Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
