Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Randomize
