I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
