Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
