Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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