I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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