its not stalking. its research.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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