did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Randomize
