I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
