You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
