He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
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