sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
This house was built for laser tag.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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