I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Randomize