I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
you traded sex for a burrito?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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