The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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