they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
