Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
