Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
please don't ironically join a cult
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