when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
