just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
