big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
