and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
