You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize