Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
