is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
