I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
