i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
