I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
