It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
