I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
