The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
They have beer where we have blood.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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