oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
