He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Randomize