CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
