My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Randomize
