do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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