I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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