Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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