i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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