Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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