I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
