I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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