After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
