therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
