Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize