She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Randomize