It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
