life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
