I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
