wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize