are you so shy because you have an std?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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