I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I wish life had little blips of pornography
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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